TOP 14 SIGNS YOUR SWIMMING POOL NEEDS CLEANING

14. Neighborhood kids ask if they can jump on your trampoline.

13. pH is so high, in vitro fertilization is possible.

12. Kids still pee in your pool, but they refuse to get in it first.

11. Skipping rocks across it causes sparks.

10. New algae species attract a Discovery Channel film crew to your backyard.

9. That green tarp covering your pool? Look again, Sparky.

8. Jello-like water slowing the pace of water polo games to unacceptable levels.

7. The Grim Reaper shows up in his Speedo.

6. "DREDGE ME" spelled out in algae on the bottom.

5. You can walk on the water, even though you're only the son of Gus.

4. Dr. Kervorkian seen filling IV bottles at pool side.

3. Your recently installed pool filter resembles the Marlboro Man's chest x-ray.

2. You haven't seen that much scum since Mickey Rourke's last movie.

and the Number 1 Sign Your Swimming Pool Needs Cleaning...

1. The amount of body hair found in the drain gives even Robin Williams a run for his money.